The Frail. They’re a Band

Posted on October 11, 2007

I just got this album the other day. It’s an EP from The Frail. Four songs total, so no matter what it’s not going to waste much of your time. I think it’s pretty good. I’m not dying to tell you about it, but what else am I going to write about all totally sober in the middle of a weekday? The only other thing that comes to mind is Burger King, but that’s because as soon as I finish writing this, I’m going to go get some…The Frail - Count On This

Filed Under Pretty Awesome, The Sound of Music | 2 Comments

Me? Drunk? There’s a 92% Chance

Posted on October 4, 2007

Sailor Jerry Rum

Sailor Jerry Spiced Rum. It’s delicious, reasonably priced, and conveniently high in alcohol content. This stuff is flavoured with so much goodness that it doesn’t require the time-tested palate for alcohol I have, so even you and your underage friends can enjoy it. Sailor Jerry is 92 Proof — which means when you open a bottle there’s a 92% chance you’re going to get douchebag wasted. It’s the perfect staple for any night of the week, because let’s face it, if you’re not drunk 92% of the time, what are you doing with your life? Baby Jesus only gave you one youth and one liver for a reason, so: put them both to good use and drown in a bottle.

With Rum & Rum,
Edward H.

Filed Under It's Alcohol, Pretty Awesome | 1 Comment

SkullCandy™ Are Friends of Music, Dead Animals, Me

Posted on October 2, 2007

TI Headphones

No matter how hard I try to berate and humiliate, I still manage to get product sent to me. Most recently, Brad over at SkullCandy™ sent me some headphones. These little white earbuds that are convenient not only for listening to your music, but for blocking out the sounds of children and the elderly alike. The sound quality of them is conveniently good, although the real benefit I’ve been reaping from them is this: Imagine you’re at the grocery store and some old grey haired so-and-so is asking if you can help with some bags out to the parking lot. You don’t even have to say no and look rude in front of the whole lineup — you can just straight up look away. I do this to homeless people too. There’s only so many times you can pull out lines like “Oh sorry, I only carry 50’s”, and “What? No, man. This change is the only thing separating me from you.” before they stop making you laugh.

On top of the little white earbuds I use in public, they sent me these bad-ass, massive black TI things. They’ve got fur all over, which is convenient because so does my chest. The picture here doesn’t show it — but the ones I have, the ear pieces also are big mounds of black fur… like my chest.

Nice work SkullCandy™,
Edward H.

Filed Under Pretty Awesome, The Sound of Music | 5 Comments